Chapter Text
Something within Tim inherently changes after the incident at the circus.
He feels heavier as if there was an invisible weight around his shoulders.
Death’s shadow was following him.
The boy wakes up from nightmares of watching the Flying Graysons die again and again. All in perfect detail.
Tim knows that this isn’t his first time witnessing death. He knows in the back of his mind that bloodshed and violence were common to him…before.
The child falls out of his bed, having woken up from another nightmare
Tim slams open his bathroom door, not caring about making noise.
His parents weren’t even in Drake Manor right now, so they couldn’t complain.
He hops on a stool and turns on the sink. Tim splashes cold water onto his face before anxiously washing his hands.
“It won’t come off….it won’t come off…it won’t come off—“ He mumbles to himself, his voice turning hysterical.
He can still feel the blood on him. It won’t fade.
The boy cries before staring at his reflection in the mirror. A man stares back at him.
Tim grinds his teeth in anger.
“I hate you!” The boy snarls at his reflection, his wet hands gripping the edges of the mirror.
His reflection looks back, unfazed.
“You ruined everything! I hate you! I hate you!” The boy’s temper flares, a rare occurrence for Timothy Jackson Drake but not for Sasuke Uchiha.
The child looks at himself in the mirror. His disgust is palpable. This man was a traitor, a war criminal, a monster who lusted for vengeance.
He was the him from before.
Tim hates Sasuke Uchiha.
“You gave it all up so easily! So willingly!” The child rants, turning feral.
“Give it back! Give it back—“ Tim rages.
Give me my life back.
A surge of hatred and guilt fills the child the longer he stares at himself in the mirror.
Tim avidly ignores his reflection after that. He’d rarely let himself be photographed and he’d religiously ignore looking at his reflection on any surface.
In everyone else’s eyes, Timothy Jackson Drake is Timothy Jackson Drake.
The only one whom he can’t fool is himself.
His eyes can see through everything after all.
Tim figures it out when he’s seven.
He’s sitting on his living room couch, randomly flipping through channels on his TV.
He switches through a bunch of news channels but stops at one when he hears a mention of Batman and Robin.
Tim watches a clip of Batman and Robin gliding through the sky. They stop by a clock tower to rest before continuing their patrol. Batman simply grapples away, but Tim stares as Robin does a quadruple somersault off the tower before swinging to the next building.
“Enjoy our show! I’ll do a quadruple somersault just for you!”
“Oh my god—“ Tim gasps, almost dropping the tomato rice ball he made for dinner.
Dick Grayson is Robin which means that Bruce Wayne is Batman.
The news channel features some other clips of the caped crusaders.
Tim’s eyes itch as a clip of Robin taking out some goons shows on the screen.
His movements were fluid and agile, but an undercurrent of anger and grief was hidden in Dick’s fighting too.
Tim could relate to those emotions.
For what is grief, if not love persevering?
Tim finishes his rice ball before heading up the stairs to one of the manor’s storage rooms. He remembers his father keeping a certain photo there, not wanting to be reminded of the incident they witnessed on their supposed family outing. The child opens up some boxes and begins to search through numerous photos before stopping as he gently holds the picture they took with the Flying Graysons.
Tim falters at the picture, remembering vividly the deaths that occurred but also the affection he received from the youngest Grayson.
His affection felt brotherly to Tim.
Tim misses his brother more often than not. He’s not used to being an only child. He never was even after—
Itachi—Itachi—
The boy decides to make a copy of the photo. One for himself and one for Dick.
He keeps the original in his room and puts the copy in an envelope. Tim then goes back downstairs to grab a coat and put on his shoes.
He starts his trek towards the Wayne Manor.
It takes a while for Tim to get there because of the plots of land in between their houses.
He rings the buzzer on the gate and when it opens, he makes his way to the front door.
Tim inhales deeply to calm his nerves before ringing the doorbell.
The door opens and Tim thinks it’ll be Alfred Pennyworth who’ll open the door, but instead, it’s Bruce Wayne.
“Oh! Hello, chum! Timothy right?” Bruce greets, glancing around his courtyard before kneeling in front of Tim.
“Are your parents here?” He asks, his Brucie persona taking place.
Tim shakes his head.
“No, sir. I’m here on my own. I just came to drop this off.” The boy reaches out to hand the envelope to Bruce.
Bruce opens the envelope, carefully taking the photo out of it.
“This is….” The man utters in surprise.
“I don’t know if you remember my family being there, but we kept the photo. I made a copy for your ward, Dick Grayson.” Tim responds, turning his gaze to the floor.
“I’m not sure if he has many photos of them, so I just thought—I just thought—“
Bruce cuts Tim off, ruffling his hair softly.
“Thank you, Timothy. You are a very kind boy for doing this for Dick. I’ll give it to him once he’s back home from shopping with Alfred.”
Tim nods his head a small smile on his face.
“Did you want to stay for dinner, chum? We always have room for more.” Bruce asks.
“No, I’m fine. Thank you for the offer though, Mr. Wayne. I’ll take my leave now.”
Bruce shakes his head,
“I insist or at least let me drive you home. It’s quite a walk from here to Drake’s Manor.”
Tim takes a step back, his body tensing as he grows uncomfortable.
“No. I’ll be fine, Mr. Wayne.” The child whispers, catching Bruce’s gaze.
“I’ll be okay.”
Lies. He’ll never be because—
Tim turns and leaves, ignoring Bruce’s calls to come back.
A few years later, his parents gave him a camera for his birthday. At first, Tim didn’t use it that much. There wasn’t anything he wanted to capture, if anything his memory alone was enough for him.
The thought comes to him at four in the morning while Tim is sipping on some tea in his kitchen. He had tried to sleep earlier, but his nightmarish memories kept him awake.
He stares at the tea leaves floating in his water and thinks,
What if I took pictures of Batman and Robin?
Tim then begins to trail after the heroes with his camera, carefully memorizing their patrol routes and patterns.
He becomes their little stalker, collecting numerous photos of them while out at night. As time passes though, Tim grows a bit envious of Batman and Robin.
Behind the lens of his camera, the child can see how much good they’re doing for Gotham.
Tim wants to do that too.
He wants to repent be good.
For once in his life, he wants to do something right.
